Fml
One and a half weeks back at home and the thoughts I used to have back in high school have come back. Note to self: never stay at home for more than a week again.
Today
I am one of those people who is actually good at remembering birthdays and significant events from the past on the calendar. Maybe I will eventually forget some dates as the years go by and I have to remember more relevant things.
I feel very lazy all of a sudden. Today, I woke up at 6pm after sleeping around 2am. This is better than last Sunday when I woke up at 6pm after sleeping around 11pm. Haha. In 2 weeks, I will commence as a full time Actuarial Analyst. I see it as the beginning of the end of my life. I have reached my ultimate goal after college of “getting a job.” So, now what? Well, there is that whole get a husband/family nonsense. With my career, I don’t really see that happening soon. I just don’t think I have time for that unless he is perfect, for me.
Also, after spending a few hours with my 4 month old nephew, I realize, I am definitely not ready for any full time babysitting. After researching and developing, I figured out my signature baby move to get him to finally like me. It is exhausting, although, I would pick a baby over a guy at the moment. LOL
Two
Two months into my internship and it finally feels like we, excluding the pothead, are being welcomed by our coworkers. It was a really slow start and I thought none of us had a chance to make it ever past June, but it looks like things are getting better, socially and workload-wise. I feel less uncomfortable and less like a stranger in the office. However, all of a sudden I have built this new reputation at both jobs… In a way it is good to have one, but this new label is not the best. If it does help me to advance my career then there is something wrong with this world, but I will not fight it because I still would like a job. To reject such an opportunity for such reasons would also be wrong and a waste of almost a year of applying to jobs and grad schools. I do still like the idea of going back to school once more and reliving college life in the NYC. At this point, I don’t really know what I want more. However, right now, I really miss sleep and having a two day weekend. I can’t wait for memorial day.
Because I am not allowed to post his picture on Facebook because my niece is jealous of him, I will put him here. He’s so squishy.
Betty: it’s scary that as we grow older and older, a lot of things are no longer the same
We realize as we grow up that Prince Charming from Cinderella will not come and save us, instead, we must settle for the boy next door. Even then, you learn that nice guys will still break your heart and life is nothing like the movies, it’s more like an Asian drama. Also, ‘forever’ no longer means eternity, but more like a few years.
Retirement
I work in the retirement line of business. Usually you think that you will just work with old people, but I don’t. I work only with numbers and probabilities. I calculate the present value of retirement benefits using the probability that each person will live to some year. It is common knowledge that there is a chance you won’t live tomorrow, but to actually work with the numerical probability that a person may or may not live to see retirement is kind of morbid. There are these things called Mortality Tables. It’s like the likelihood you will live to some age from some age in a giant chart. They are all less than one.
I also learned about this thing called joint and survivor where if you die after retirement, your spouse can still get some percent of your retirement benefits until they die. I guess it is supposed to be some sort of consolation that the person you married is now dead, but you can still have some money. People at the office use the words “die” and “death” so loosely. I wonder if this job has made them indifferent towards their own future.
Week 2
The first day at work was easy, then it just got hard. I don’t know what I am doing as I am doing it, but then find out later. If only this process was in reverse so that my life could be a little easier. ANYWAY…
I HAS INTERNET! MY LIFE IS BETTER!
I also have discovered that using Google chrome has less problems than when I use Firefox. When I used Firefox, my computer would error after 5 minutes of use. Yay, Google.
Let’s see if this second week in CT is better now that I have reconnected with the rest of the world.
Day one of new job: I think I will enjoy it here. My picture of my ID is upside-down cuz I am posting from my iPod at the Starbucks in the mall which is about to close. Fuck having no Internet. Seriously.
